


Equilibrium

by DarkestInfatuations



Category: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles - All Media Types
Genre: Dysfunctional Relationships, Emotional Constipation, M/M, Unrequited Love, dub-con
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-10-16
Updated: 2013-10-16
Packaged: 2017-12-29 14:43:33
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,893
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1006626
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DarkestInfatuations/pseuds/DarkestInfatuations
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Leonardo takes it a step to far one night, and Raphael has had enough of his shit.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Equilibrium

"No, you don't understand Raphael! I am the leader of this group, yet every time I make a decision, you completely ignore me!" Leonardo dropped his pointing finger, staring Raphael down.  
  
"You either run off, or go get yourself hurt, or put us in danger, or a million other things I can't even begin to count and don't want to think about! Do you even think about what you do? Do you even care about the safety of our family?!" He watched the fire burn brighter in his brothers' eyes, his face twist into his visage of pure and utter anger. The longer he stared at his brother, the darker the dojo became.  
  
"Ya think I'd fuckin' do anythin' to purposefully put us in danger?" Leo took a few lungfulls of air through his nostrils.  
  
"Sometimes, I wonder Raphael. I think you might be just as attention seeking as Michelangelo, only in the worst of ways. You always itch for a fight, no matter what the cost is to anyone around you!" He noticed his eyes narrow as a growl emerged from him.  
  
"How fuckin' dare you say that! What, ya think I wanna fuckin' see any of you get hurt? You don' think I already feel like a worthless piece of shit any time anything is my fault?! You make damn sure I do! I fuckin' make mistakes Leo! So do you!" The flames in his eyes looked bright enough to suffocate. He turned away, going for the dojo door.  
  
"Maybe if ya didn't have yer goddamn head up your own ass or splinters you'd notice!" He called, walking toward it.  
  
"Excuse you?! I'm not the one who runs from all of my problems! I confront my mistakes, I make peace with them!" Raphael turned around viciously, sneering at Leonardo.  
  
"Ev'ry fuckin' mistake 'cept any ya make with me! Ya even so much as step on anyone else's toes and you'd practically fuckin' break yer own shell ta' bend over backwards for 'em, but you fuck around with me like I don' have any feelings!"  
  
"Maybe if you'd treat me like I had any, I'd give you the same courtesy! You won't even listen to anything I say, Raphael. You act like everything I do is some kind of personal attack against you!" The emerald turtle walked closer, growling wordlessly again.  
  
"'Cause it fuckin' is, and you know it. Ya know I hate bein' controlled and you don' love anything more than controllin' whatever or whoever ya can. I ain't sorry I don't coddle ya like splinter an' mikey do, that I don't constantly tell ya what an amazing leader ya are. And ever since me an' Donnie have been together, it's only gotten worse. Ya can't fuckin' have everyone at yer feet, Leonardo. I'm through with yer fuckin' shit." Raphael said the words lowly and Leonardo knew it was a warning. The larger turtle stood in wait, staring unblinkingly at Leonardo. He went to turn, but the turtle he was staring at responded before he could move.  
  
"Fine, go! Run from your problems like you always do. How very brave of you, Raphael. Donatello will be pleased when you come back so he can _coddle you_ while he treats your wounds. Then I'm sure you'll sulk like a kicked dog until splinter has to step in! All because your ass is tender over something I said!"  
  
The last of Leonardos' words rung throughout the dojo with an air of finality. His breath caught in his lungs when Raphaels eyes… changed.  
  
He'd seen the energy in his eyes so very many times. When he was determined, when he was angry, and lately when he had looked at Donatello. He'd seen the flicker or burn out when he was sad, the glow when he was content, and everything in between. But there was something… cold about them the blue banded brother couldn't place. Something that made chills run up and down his spine.  
  
His state of alarm intensified when he received no response. The largest of the four Hamato brothers simply stood, staring at him in utter stillness, panting through his nose, fists clenched as his sides.  
  
"Raph…" the emerald turtle simply narrowed his eyes, before slowly advancing on him. The slow, deliberate steps set every warning system the older turtle had off. There was no smile to insinuate a joke, no angry cursing.  
  
Only the very hard and feral look in his eye.  
  
"Raphael, I'm warning you-"  
  
"What, _Fearless_?" Leo started to back up when Raphael was a foot outside of arms length, but his brother continued to advance. He chuckled darkly.  
  
"Though in this situation, tha nickname ain't too accurate… is it?" He stopped, practically hissing the last of his words. Leonardo stopped, but suddenly realized his mistake.  
  
He bolted, hearing Raphael thundering after him. He neared the door, but felt his brother grip his arm fiercely, using his mass and strength to literally hurl him back into the room.  
  
How could he have not felt him reaching for him?  
  
He swung his body, moving to kick him square in the face. However, the same hands grabbed his foot, jerking his body forward. Raphaels fist met him half way, striking jugular notch and brachial plexus points so hard the smaller turtle was completely stunned, and with a furious punch to the face he collapsed.  
  
Leonados vision swam and he gasped for air, trying to right himself. His mind reeled, telling him how utterly stupid he was, how easily his brother had splayed him on the dojo mats. But before he could do anything, he felt his brother easily tossing him over his shoulder, walking out of the dojo.  
  
He was still trying to regain his breath as he saw the stairs to the upper level passing by, the sound of Michelangelos whining and Donatellos irritated voice barely audible from within the closed doors of the lab. Fear crawled up his throat, whispering for him to call out to his lover.  
  
However, he was far too prideful for that.  
  
"I don't know what you're doing but I'm _warning_ you _now_ to _**stop**_!" Leonardo hissed, preparing to struggle. However, his brother anticipated it, hitting another point behind Leonardos knee as he walked into said turtles room.  
  
"I ain't yer soldier Leo, not yer slave or yer bitch. I don' take orders from you. M' gonna level this out, right here."  
  
He grabbed the rim of Leonardos carapace, throwing him back on the bed none to gently.  
  
"And right now."  
  
Leo heard Raphael pad out of the room quickly, and moved to try and massage the pain out of the knee. He knew it would take at least 30 seconds or more to be able to walk on it. The moment he leaned up to try and stand, Raphael was back once more, something in his hand as he closed and locked the door. The smaller turtle couldn't see it in the dim candlelight, but he could hazard an intelligent guess when Raphael threw it on the bed.  
  
"I don't know what the hell you're thinking but if you touch me-"  
  
"What, yer gonna go cry ta Mikey? Oh, I'm real scared Leo. _Real_ scared."  
  
The fear began to suffocate him when Raphaels large hands grabbed his hips, viciously flipping him shell up, resting his weight on his knees. He grabbed both of his wrists, pinning them behind his back, holding him up.  
  
"Raphael, _do **not**_ touch me!" Leonardo screamed, struggling and finally landing a solid kick to his brothers sensitive skin between plastron and carapace. The larger turtle snarled, shoving him face first into the bed.  
  
"'Er what? Last time I checked _you_ were tha one ass up on tha mattress, _great leader_ ," Raph spat venomously. Leo struggled desperately when he felt the cold lube hit his exposed ass.  
  
"Can't we just fucking _talk_ about this?!" His screaming voice hit a frantic pitch as he struggled harder, to no avail. Raphael had made his mind up.  
  
"No Leo, we can't. Ya done made that decision fer me." His captive gave a strangled gasp when he thrust one finger in roughly, not wasting any time waiting as he started to thrust it deeply.  
  
"Ya won't listen to a damn thing I say, doesn't matter whether I cuss ya or apologize." Leo gasped for air on his pressured trachea, panting when he thrust it harder.  
  
"I always get tha same response, tha same treatment. M' fucking sick and tired of it, Leo. I've warned you, I've begged ya ta fucking stop and think, ta stop treating me like a toy."  
  
"I-AH!" his word quickly ended in a short scream as Raphael thrust another finger inside him too quickly.  
  
"No. Ya don't get ta say a _**damn**_ _thing_. Fer once in yer fuckin' life, yer gonna know exactly how you made me feel." Leonardo was immediately confused at his brothers words. He didn't know if he was having trouble breathing because of the position he'd been thrown into, his weight resting mostly on this splayed neck, or the suffocating feeling that he had done something to hurt Raphael this bad.  
  
He had never felt fear like his. But there was something in his chest that felt like it was tearing him apart and filling him up at the same time. Raphael began to scissor his fingers, and the smaller turtle began to gasp, tears forming in his eyes.  
  
"I _**don't**_ _want_ this, Raph!"  
  
He tried to struggle again, but it only served to remind him of the fingers in his ass. He whined miserably, stilling his body when he realized any movements just enhanced the sensations.  
  
"Oh yeah, yer strugglin' real hard, fearless. But I'll make a bet with ya." Raphael leaned forward to whisper in his ear, flicking the Leo's tail gently, making him gasp.  
  
"If yer not moaning like a bitch in heat 'fore this is over, I'll never fuckin' argue with ya again." Leonardo tried vainly to find something to reply with as he felt Raphs fingers withdrawal slickly. Before he could move to try again for freedom, fingers were ghosting over his slit. He moaned shortly, dropping before he could realize what he'd done.  
  
Raph rumbled as he leaned back, positioning himself. He grasped Leo's hip with his free hand while tightening his grip on his wrists.  
  
"Raph, please-"  
  
"Shut up, Leo."  
  
"I know that you- _uu **AH**_!" The larger turtle thrust in hard, burying himself to the hilt. He growled, and his brother whined at the vibration as he paused to let him adjust. Leo tried to control his breathing, the burning turning into pain. The emotional pain he couldn't place just intensified its physical counterpart. He didn't know how long he spent gasping for breath, trying to adjust and listening to Raphaels own breaths in the silent room, barely audible over the blood rushing through his veins.  
  
"Raph, I c-" Before he could finish, the red banded turtle pulled nearly out before slamming in as hard and fast as he could.  
  
" _ **Fuck**_!" Raph set a bruisingly hard pace, growls lacing his pants as he fought to thrust deeper and limit his speed. Leonardo was almost deafened by the sound of their skin slapping together and his own pained gasps.  
  
"Raph!  It _hurts_ ," he yelled, clenching his eyes together. Raphaels' thrusts didn't falter.  
  
"Does it, Leo?" He felt one of his hands barely brush against his bobbing cock.  
  
"Yer still hard." As soon as he'd given the friction he took it away, moving his iron grip back to his hip. It wasn't as if Leonardo had never bottomed, even though it was rare; but even though he had, Raphael was much larger than Michelangelo was. Leo cried out at a particularly hard thrust.  
  
"Spread yer legs farther. Stop clenching," Raphael said gently, pushing down on his brothers hip. Leonardo did as he was told, trying to put his focus on calming his mind and body. He found it nearly impossible with this suffocating feeling and lack of oxygen.  
  
He sighed deeply when the pain passed as Raphael guided him to arch his back, as much as he could, and spread his legs a little farther. When he thrust in again, he hit Leo's prostate, and the smaller turtle moaned desperately. Raphael continued to thrust in hard, making Leo cry out in pleasure. He suddenly realized what he was doing, stuffing his face in the rocking bed, trying to stifle his moans. He could hear the same dark chuckle emanating from Raphael.  
  
"Guess I win, Leo," he whispered. Leo turned his head again, struggling to take in enough air. He tugged on his arms.  
  
"Pl- _ **AHhhHH**_!" his outcry ended in a high pitched whine as Raphael gave a few dangerously powerful thrusts, silencing him. He rumbled lowly in warning.  
  
"Let m-me have my hands b-back, please Raph, _nnnHhhg_!" Raphael gave another savage thrust, pulling Leos' body back to meet his.  
  
" _ **No**_." Leo stopped struggling, trying to breathe.  
  
"Tha only way yer gonna get off 's from my cock." Leo churred at the lewd words as Raphael shifted his hips, hitting Leo's prostate so hard the the smaller turtle saw stars.  
  
"F-fuck! Raaaph," he moaned desperately. The red banded turtle gave a rumbling churr, making Leo writhe at the added stimulation of the vibrations. The yellow-green turtle tugged his arms again desperately.  
  
"Please, Raph, my arms," He gasped.  
  
"I can't breathe." Raphael snarled, relinquishing his hold, moving to grasp the top of his carapace with his free hand. Leo pushed his arms beneath him, moving his weight to his elbows as he gripped the sheets beneath him, mewling lewdly in between pants. He spread his legs further, encouraging Raphael to go faster, harder, deeper, something. Anything. Raph laughed aloud.  
  
"This in't gonna be over that fast, Leo. Yer gonna remember this fer tha rest of yer life." Leonardo moaned lowly, trying to appease him.  
  
"Ev'ry time we argue, Ev'ry time ya say somethin' ta hurt me so I'll shut up and you can be right, ev'ry time ya look at me, ev'ry time ya fuckin' _think_ of me, yer gonna remember me fuckin' you senseless." Leo couldn't hold back his strangled churr as he arched farther, heat pooling in his gut. Raphael took the invitation, pulling Leo's hips to meet his thrusts slightly, shifting to thrust deeper and harder.  
  
"Yes, oh god!" He screamed, riding out the storm that was Raphael. His heart twisted painfully, making him moan lowly and fist the sheets, his agony seeping through his voice. Raphaels thrusts didn't falter, but his grip on his hips did.  
  
"Don't stop," Leo whispered.  
  
It was one command Raphael didn't mind obeying.  
  
  
  
_***~*-*~***_  
  
  
  
Leo struggled to remain in his meditative state. Any time he wasn't doing something, his mind would revert what had transpired between him and Raphael. And when he started to think about it, it hurt too bad to continue.  
  
To be honest, he had no clue what had happened after he climaxed; he vaguely remembered Raphaels voice, and then darkness. He'd woken up the next morning with Mikey plastered all over his side. That morning was strange; neither Raphael nor Donatello were in the house when he awoke, and didn't come back until that night.  
  
Since that night 2 weeks ago, Raphael had not spoken more than sentence to him, and only when he had to. He looked at him, acknowledged his presence, but had refused to talk with him or train with him. Splinter was pressing him to make amends. Amends he knew somewhere, deep down, he could never make no matter how hard he tried.  
  
It hurt Leonardo.  
  
What part of the fucked up mess did, he wasn't sure. And in these times, he always went to Donnie. He would never tell him what had happened, but just to hear him babble on reassuringly about anything was enough to make him feel like it was okay.  
  
Leo rose from his spot in the dojo, peeling his bare skin from the mats. He walked silently into the main room, and not seeing his Michelangelo anywhere, headed for the lab door.  
  
He stopped a few steps from the partially open door, drawing a quick breath.  
  
He could see Donnie splayed on his back atop the work table, various items having been pushed off it and broken. His eyes were clenched shut, head tilted back and mouth agape. He was thrusting his hips, moaning shamelessly.  
  
"Raphie!" He slammed his head back, whining.  
  
"Easy, Donnie." He saw Raphaels hand slip beneath Donatellos' head, cradling it. The emerald skin came into view as he started licking and nibbling Donatellos' exposed neck, moving up to kiss him.  
  
Leo turned swiftly walking a few steps away. It wasn't uncommon within the last week for them to be fucking eachother on whatever piece of furniture they found convenient.  
  
But Leonardo paused, pondering about what he had seen and what had transpired between him and Raphael.  
  
No, they weren't fucking each other. They were making love.  
  
Without thinking, the eldest of the brothers ran for the lairs door, slipping into the sewers and running as fast as his legs could carry him.  
  
He now knew what Raphael had been running from, what he himself had wanted.  
  
Perhaps now that they had both suffered, they would find an equilibrium.


End file.
